There was a mother inside of the grocery store the other day, and while in line, she was complaining about everything. About the length of the line, the volume of the music, the cashier was too slow, the weather. . . and I looked down at her daughter, who seemed to be about 4 years old, the look on her face said – “Mom please just be happy.”
Her look made me smile and made my day happier – maybe not her moms, but mine. As I was driving in my car, I was wondering why people are so “Negative” “Judgemental”. . . my thinking processed answered both of those questions.
To the negative part:
I think people need to start using the “F” Word. . . FAITH. You see, our society has made us creatures of habit to look through glasses of negative thinking. Negative thinking can be synonymous with “Problem Thinking”. No matter what the situation, you will always find the problem or the bad in any environment. Rather than dwelling on the negative though – let’s jump to the solution
What is Positive Thinking?
Simple – it’s “Good Thinking”. You have faith that no matter what happens, good will always prevail. And what is the key ingredient to make “Good” prevail. . . YOU!
If I asked you to go to a party and look for all the “negative”. You will see the person leaning against the wall feeling alone, the girl that is mad at her boyfriend. . .HECK you might even think the music sucks. But, if I asked you to find all the good. . . you will notice people dancing, having fun, talking, smiling. . . you see. . .what you look for – is what you notice. If you want to find negative – you’ll damn well see it. But what’s more fun, seeing all the bad or the good?
The first step in thinking positive is to SEE THE WORLD AS IT IS. No judgments. No biases (as much as possible.) Yes that is right, as it is. Both bad and good. HOWEVER. . .
With that in mind, the next step is to: SEE THE WORLD 5X BETTER THAN IT REALLY IS. You see with this, you are creating a vision, a goal, and you must have faith that you can get there. MLK had a vision, Lincoln had a vision, Obama has a vision – and there is no doubt in his mind that he will achieve his vision. And his mission is to get us to join him on achieving his vision – being positive, and CHANGE will prevail.
Most negative people find the problems. Positive people find the solutions to those problems to meet and achieve the vision they have in their mind. This pertains to business, careers, and even relationships. You see, if you look at your relationship with a negative mindset. . .YES YOU WILL FIND PROBLEMS! All relationships have problems, positive people find the solutions to those problems because they have faith that their vision and dreams for that relationship will prevail – NO MATTER WHAT.
Now – what is faith? I asked that question to a class of 5th graders one day and a student replied, “Faith is like air – you can’t see it, but you know it is there.” WOW! Yes, you may not be able to see the end goal, the prevailing vision, the outcome, but you know that a good one is there. . . so keep breathing, be persistent, never give up, take the extra step, YOU WILL SUCCEED. Have Faith.
STOP BEING JUDGMENTAL
The lady in the grocery store was making comments about the cashier. She wasn’t fast enough, she talked to much. . . etc etc.
Most people are quick to make judgments – we all do! So, this is my solution. Don’t be judgmental, be curious. I was at a dinner party and there was a lady that was dressed like she was going to the oscars. Everyone said she was stuck up, snooty, negative, and judgmental (even though they just made judgments). Rather than judge her, I was curious of why she was like this. I sat down next to her and just started asking rather bold questions – but I got to the root of her problem.
You see, she was hurting so much inside, that this was her avenue to vent. She places herself above everyone to make her feel good.
The lady in the store – you never know – she maybe on the brink of being laid off, her house could be in foreclosure, she may have a new grandchild that came into the world and every thought is of seeing him for the first time. . . . YOU NEVER KNOW!
So rather than be judgmental and looking at people with a negative mindset. . . be curious.
Try this:
Try to not have ONE negative thought for 7 days. That is right, not one! If one comes into your mind, instantly change it to be positive. This doesn’t mean that you have to overlook the bad, but you find the solutions. If you are having a bad day, “I am stressed, but I am going to go work out to help alleviate some of the tension.”
Now here is the challenge, if you are into this at day 6 and you have a negative day,. . . START OVER! You see, as you do this, you will start to infect people. Those around you will see you glow, they will be curious what “Wonder Drug” you are on – negativity is contagious. . . so is positivity.
That’s all for now.
With Kindness,
Brian Williams
Youth Motivational Speaker
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